Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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