I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
The adults are the big ones right?
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
