whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
My friends, they love my intelligence
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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