Walk of Shame today included voting.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
