Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize