Do you still have your period?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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