There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
