We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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