Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
