I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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