i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
