so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
