I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Randomize
