p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
