Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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