I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Blood and glitter go together right?
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
