Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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