Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize