he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize