I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
