i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
