can we get nightvision for the apartment?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
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