is your mom at the bar?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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