Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
