p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Randomize
