Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Randomize
