This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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