I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
last night I used snow as a chaser
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
