He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
