Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
