So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize