Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
