it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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