i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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