Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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