Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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