Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I want to stick my p in your. b.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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