Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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