i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
