So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Randomize
