Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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