I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
