She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
