Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
