i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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