If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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