Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
