I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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