I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
you mean i was at the winter classic?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
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