Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
how drunk are you?
Several
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
