I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Randomize
